Don’t worry, this list definitely includes Taurasi’s beloved door.
A brand new year has arrived, which means that it’s time for each and every sports publication to trot out their various “best of” lists. However, while recapping the high points in women’s sports in 2021 is important, I think it’s also necessary to remember the moments that made us laugh. So without further ado, here are six of the most hilarious things to happen in women’s sports last year.
Sam Kerr KO’ing a pitch invader
Now that was an absolute smackdown. It reminds me of that time when Dejan Lovren confronted a pitch invader in the World Cup Final a few years back…except, you know, instead of attacking a run-of-the-mill creep like Kerr did, he lashed out at a feminist revolutionary trying to protest human rights abuses. Oops.
Anyways, there are aspects of Kerr’s case that are rather disturbing––the lack of an arrest, for one––but good on her for showing that weirdo who’s boss. Gosh, I can’t wait to see her in action during the UWCL quarters. She’s so talented, and Chelsea look absolutely deadly at the moment––
*murmuring in earpiece*
Wait, what do you mean, “They didn’t make it out of the group stage?”
I retract my prior statement––Chelsea won’t be making an appearance in the knockout stages. But hey, we’ll always have this hilarious moment to remember their short-lived European campaign by.
Diana Taurasi and the door
This incident ended up on the list for its notoriety. But honestly, the way that WNBA fans have trivialized it is shameful. Broken Door III had a promising career ahead of her with the Sky, but thanks to Taurasi’s brutal assault, she’ll never be able to swing on her hinges again. Why has the league allowed such a horrifying thing to happen without repercussions? Do they not care for the safety of their personnel?
The only upside to the situation is that Door was invited to the Sky’s title celebration as a special guest. But one measly party is a poor substitute for a stolen career. Diana Taurasi, you have blood on your hands. Blood. On. Your. Hands. (Or maybe not. Do doors bleed? Unclear.)
Sunisa Lee’s Medal Mishap
Very few people on the planet have been able to win an Olympic title, but Suni Lee won three at the age of eighteen. When she returned from Tokyo, her fans were curious about what she planned to do with the medals. Would she keep them in her dorm at Auburn University? Give them to her family for safekeeping? Maybe pawn them off for a boatload of money? (Admittedly, that’s what I would do.)
literally only me https://t.co/Jo93v1egma— Sunisa lee (@sunisalee_) November 4, 2021
Well, it appears that she locked them away in a safe––which might remain closed for a long, long time. “I don’t know the code to get them out,” she confessed over Snapchat in November. Here’s hoping that her memory recovers. If it doesn’t, then she better have a blowtorch handy.
Hsieh Su-Wei’s…interesting choice of headgear
You know what? Words can’t do it justice. Just look at it.
Ariarne Titmus’s coach losing his mind
After her gold medal win in Tokyo, Titmus took extra care to shout out her coach, Dean Boxall. “[It’s] for him as much as it is for me,” she said. “He puts 100 percent into being a swimming coach.” Judging by his absolutely wild reaction to her victory, he likes to put that same amount of effort into his post-meet celebrations.
Dean Boxall, coach of Australia’s Ariarne Titmus, after she beats Katie Ledecky in the 400M free to win gold pic.twitter.com/JPujZa9eMg— Darren Rovell (@darrenrovell) July 26, 2021
I feel bad for that attendant in the blue shirt trying to rein him in, though. And for whoever has to fix the banister that he almost certainly broke.
Jin Young Ko’s emotional reaction to her bogey-free run ending
Ko set records with her bogey-free streak in 2021, but that came to a screeching halt last August at the Cambia Portland Classic. Her reaction to the missed shot that stopped her run was nothing short of devastating:
If that wasn’t enough to make LPGA fans sob into their polo shirts, then what she said afterwards will certainly traumatize them.
“Now it’s done,” Ko said. “I’m free.”
These moments in women’s sports made 2021 a little brighter, and I can’t wait to see the hilarity that 2022 has in store. One request though: No more broken doors. Please.